Connectors Must Connect On Common Ground With Others
Posted on: July 13, 2012, by : Brandon Gilliland
This post was originally a guest post that I wrote a few months ago.

Connecting with others on a deep level is a skill. Although some can do it more easily than others, it must be developed. Energy is important in connecting.

In one of John C. Maxwell’s books, he explains some tips involved in having others  listen to you.

5 Things that Cause Someone to Listen

  • Relationships- Who you know
  • Insight-What you know
  • Success-What you have done
  • Ability-What you can do
  • Sacrifice-What you have lived

The five points mentioned above are really the five “pillars” of what causes someone to listen. Although they are all essential, I think that the most important of the five is sacrifice.

Great connectors must meet the other individual(s) on common ground. It is all about the other person. This obviously requires energy. John mentions that “It’s difficult to find common ground with others when the only person you are focused on is yourself.”

I can’t agree more!

Barriers To Finding Common Ground

  • Assumption
  • Arrogance
  • Indifference
  • Control

“All miscommunications are the result of differing assumptions”

-Jerry Ballard

We must choose to connect and not let these “barriers” to be factors.

Steps To Finding Common Ground

  • Be available
  • Listen to others
  • Ask others questions (not about yourself)
  • Be thoughtful
  • Be open
  • Be likeable
  • Be humble
  • Be adaptable

Although this list is full of great concepts to practice, I think that humility is one of the most important. Jesus modeled humility perfectly. He could have dictated others and pointed out flaws in everyone. After all, he is perfect.

Jesus technically could call us all out. Instead, He showed compassion and humility. By doing this, He connected with a lot of people!

I think of the time Jesus met with the “sinners”. Instead of meeting with the “holy huddle” of the day, Jesus decided to eat with the sinners. Although everyone is a sinner, these were considered the hard-core individuals. Jesus would not have been able to connect with these people if He did not show humility.

I think that is something for all of us to keep in perspective!

Are you focused on connecting with others on common ground? Let me know in the comments!

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  • AislinnTheLionRawr

    Man you are rocking these post with all the lessons we’ve learned!! 😆

  • well done my friend….

    Connecting with others is the reason we were created…by connecting with God…we glorify Him!…by Connecting with others to show HIM…we glorify HIM!

    It’s all in the connecting!

    • It’s all in the connecting! That’s the whole reason God put us here on this earth. To connect with others so that His name may be lifted high!

  • Madi weaver

    Nice job 🙂

    • Oh. I saw your comment on Kitty’s site! 🙂 All I can say is classic! 🙂

  • 😆 omg that dogs ears are huuugeeee!!!! lololz! Some good thought in the blog!

    • I know! haha…What kind of dog do you have?

      • I have a golden retriever!!! He’s 90 lb’s of beasttt!!! Haha but he’s a good dog :b…wbu?

  • I know that looking at everyone like they have something they can teach me has helped me connect with them. Normally most people are willing to teach you something. And boom, connection happens. Great post!

    • Great thoughts! Everyone has a story…we can learn something from anyone…

  • Great post and reminders on connecting. It’s a key for leadership. Keep up the great content!

  • Great points about connecting! Somewhere in all of this we have to consider the reason for wanting to connect. I have a friend who wants to connect, but honestly (and rather obviously) it is only as he seeks to build his own platform.

    My heartbeat is connecting with others that I can learn from and who I can help. Mutually beneficial relationships exhilarate me! Those are the people I want to connect with!

    • I like how you mentioned that some individuals wantto connect with others just to build a platform. Instead, we should connection Jesus would!

      Great thoughts! Thanks for stopping by!

  • Great re-read!

  • This is my first time to read this…it’s powerful! 

    I know that if I concentrated on others more when I engage them, I would find more success.  I am not always ‘others’ oriented but with His grace, am getting better.

    Great reminder! 

    •  Good to hear that the post encouraged some self awareness. It is hard to implement some of these things into practice, but it can be done.

      Thanks for reading!