This post was originally a guest post that I wrote a few months ago.
Connecting with others on a deep level is a skill. Although some can do it more easily than others, it must be developed. Energy is important in connecting.
In one of John C. Maxwell’s books, he explains some tips involved in having others listen to you.
5 Things that Cause Someone to Listen
- Relationships- Who you know
- Insight-What you know
- Success-What you have done
- Ability-What you can do
- Sacrifice-What you have lived
The five points mentioned above are really the five “pillars” of what causes someone to listen. Although they are all essential, I think that the most important of the five is sacrifice.
Great connectors must meet the other individual(s) on common ground. It is all about the other person. This obviously requires energy. John mentions that “It’s difficult to find common ground with others when the only person you are focused on is yourself.”
I can’t agree more!
Barriers To Finding Common Ground
“All miscommunications are the result of differing assumptions”
We must choose to connect and not let these “barriers” to be factors.
Steps To Finding Common Ground
- Be available
- Listen to others
- Ask others questions (not about yourself)
- Be thoughtful
- Be open
- Be likeable
- Be humble
- Be adaptable
Although this list is full of great concepts to practice, I think that humility is one of the most important. Jesus modeled humility perfectly. He could have dictated others and pointed out flaws in everyone. After all, he is perfect.
Jesus technically could call us all out. Instead, He showed compassion and humility. By doing this, He connected with a lot of people!
I think of the time Jesus met with the “sinners”. Instead of meeting with the “holy huddle” of the day, Jesus decided to eat with the sinners. Although everyone is a sinner, these were considered the hard-core individuals. Jesus would not have been able to connect with these people if He did not show humility.
I think that is something for all of us to keep in perspective!
Are you focused on connecting with others on common ground? Let me know in the comments!